What is fear? Fear is an experience. And, as an NLP practitioner fear is the basis of most of the work I do.
Your fear creates the basis for everything you like and don’t like in your life. It was learned from your biological parents and the people that took care of you until you were about 3 years old… Most likely you don’t like the same things your mother or primary care giver didn’t like. This is because you developed this part of your brain 2 months before you were born to about when you turned 3. At this point your experience was shifted into your mother… almost like people say dogs can sense their owners feelings, as a child we sense our mother and/or primary caregiver’s feelings. After that, your brain just rehearsed and practiced that information as the other parts of your brain were developing until you turn around 21 years old.
Only if you had a subsequent traumatic event like death or disappearance of a parent or some type of abuse before you turned 21 or other trauma later than 21 would you embed new changes in your like-don’t like system after the age of 3.
On the way to what we want, many times we are faced with new experiences that trigger those past memories from before we were 3. If we don’t like something our brain will trigger a painful feeling. The closer we get to some thing we don’t like the stronger the feelings our brain will trigger until we turn away to avoid the situation, or the threat is over. If we don’t remove ourself from the experience eventually our brain will trigger feelings of death.
If we are surprised by the threat like in suddenly seeing a spider or mouse, our brain might trigger us to stand on a chair or scream or even run away.
So one thing we can do, is go see a NLP practitioner to help us deal with our fear – be it getting on plane, spiders, heights, success, you name it.. and depending on the fear in about 15 minutes or so they can reduce the feelings associated with the fear. It takes a little bit longer to deal with the beliefs behind the fear and the bigger the fear, the more resolution you need.
But here is what you can do in the mean time… recognize your fear. Figure out where it came from and whose fear is it. Did it belong to your mother or father? Did you develop it? If so how? That may help you figure out your first memory of that fear. If you can get that, then in your mind, imagine putting your first memory of that fear into a black and white movie and see if you can watch it. If you can’t try moving the screen in your mind far, far away so the screen is very tiny.
Let me know how this worked for you…
Tracy Joy is an NLP practitioner, author, and speaker in Vancouver, Canada. She is an international business expert in the area of human systems analysis and thinking change. If you have brain questions, send them Tracy and she’ll answer them on this blog. She can be reached through www.TherapeuticNLP.com